Today I'm going to go a little further into chapter one! I will probably break the rest of it down into two or three sections and then we'll be on to chapter two!!
Dear Lord,
Thank you so much for your mercy and your grace. Thank you for allowing me to come back into your arms time after time. You allowed me to endure these trials for a reason, and even though I don't know what it is, I know that someday, whether on earth or in heaven, it will make sense to me. I pray that you can use my mistakes for your glory. Please Lord, help me love fall more in love with you every day. Give me the courage to be honest with myself and with you.Shine your light into those dark places in my heart so that they can be fully healed and restored and I can serve you using my full potential.
In your name I pray, Amen.
The Light Comes On
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| I cheated and used an old picture... but it's still my work! :P |
The next section of text is kind of where the "self-help" begins. It breaks down the purpose of the book into three simple steps.
"1. Identify and understand the nature of man's search for significance.
2. Recognize and challenge inadequate answers.
3. Apply God's solutions to your search for significance.
...At this point, simply ask the Lord to give you the courage to be honest. Give Him permission to shine His Spirit's light on your thoughts, feelings, and actions. You may be surprised by additional pain as you realize the extent of your wounds, but our experience of healing can only be as deep as our awareness of the need for it. This takes the power of God's light. Ask Him to turn on the light." (McGee, pg. 8)
As I prayed earlier, I asked that God would shine His light into the dark places that I have been unable to "clean" before. I am aware of some of the deep wounds, but I'm sure not all of them. I love the quote, "...but our experience of healing can only be as deep as our awareness of the need for it." I think most, if not all of my life I never realized just how much I needed healing. After going through my last relationship experience, I thought I was just a failure or that guys were all bad. But, the more I seek God, the more I realize that I have issues buried deep down that keep me from being a good partner, making good life decisions, and cause me to put God last. The wounds that have continually been cut open over and over and over again have become so deep now that I don't even realize what they are or the effects they are having on my life now. I know the light of God can heal those though and I SO look forward to that!! :)
The book continues to explain that when the "light comes on" in our life, we will find that we have been trying to meet our needs in the wrong way. How do we distinguish what we want from what we need?
" First, the simple answer is that when we are without something we need, we find ourselves incomfortable, sometimes even miserable, perhaps even at the point of death." (McGee, pg. 8)
There are many things I recognize without a doubt that I need in my life such as water, food and sleep. When I read this small section, I began to think, what else have I felt like I NEEDED in my life? A few months ago, the only things I needed were a guy to tell me he loved me and my family to approve of me. I needed to make money and be the best at my job. I needed to be independant. I paused here to think about these things. The next section of text however, pretty much blew me away...
" When we find that we percieve our lives as having no value, purpose, or significance, we become miserable. Many have even killed themseleves to avoid living a life such as this."(McGee, pg.8)
So, the author is saying we NEED value, purpose and siginificance. Imagine, someone who does not believe that God created them, God is not real, and they they are just the product of an accident and will become nothing when they die. Where is the significance in that? What would they be here for? I am so thankful that at least a part of me knew I was here for a reason and that I was thoughtfully, carefully and lovingly created by a God who knows me inside and out. If significance is a need, then going back, many of us try to meet that need in the wrong way. A good boyfriend that "loves me" makes me feel significant. Friends that think I'm "cool" or "funny" makes me feel significant. Being the best at my job makes me feel significant. How sad is it that all of these things are fleeting, and that is where I've been gaining my significance from. No WONDER I have felt so alone and that my life had no purpose. I was looking to people, events, and material things to fill this purpose in my life when all along, God's love and a relationship with Him is the ONLY eternal, unchanging, unconditional thing I will ever have in my entire life. He is where I need to find my significance. Significance and purpose and value are all things I cannot live without and I thank God now that I know where to find them. They are true NEEDS.
"The second way we know if something is critical to our lives is to see if God gives much emphasis in His Word regarding a particular need. Reading Scripture from this perspective, we find this emphasized over and over."(McGee, pg.9)
He goes on to give an example of how Jesus gave His life as ransom for our lives. God is saying we are so significant to Him that He cares about us personally, even down to the number of hairs on our head! Nothing is more important to the Lord than our welfare. So obviously, our relationship with God is a NEED. Because God re-emphasizes our importance in the Bible, the longing to know we are valued and have purpose was no accident. It is a need that was created in us, made to be filled by God. Our hunger to fill that hole causes us to find people who will love us and praise us and drives us to be succesful and work hard so that others will appreciate us. This totally explains me! I want people to love and admire me for the hard work and effort I give. In relationships, I am so quick to sacrifice my time, my money, my resources for the sake of my boyfriend because I want them to feel like I am doing a good job of caring for or loving them. I want to feel like I am an extremely successful partner. At work, I take on more than I can bear sometimes, and create new tasks that in reality make my job more stressful even though it benefits others I work with. I do this to gain respect and to feel like I am a hard worker and successful to others. I love the feeling of sacrificing myself to make others happy, but in the end the sacrifices are for nothing.
"But the man or woman who lives only for the love and attention of others is never satisfied-at least not for long. Despite our efforts, we will never find lasting, fulfilling peace if we must constantly prove ourselves to others. Our desire to be loved and accepted is a symptom of a deeper need- the need that frequently governs our behavior and is the primary source of our emotional pain. Often unrecognized, this is our need for self-worth." (McGee. pg.10)
This last passage definitely pertains to me in basically every way, shape and form. Understanding that my desires are a result of a deeper need is my first step to finding my true significance, the significance I know I will ONLY find in God.
Dear Lord,
You are such a loving God. You care enough about me to tell me time and time and time again in the Bible that my life is is important to you. You sacrificed yourself for MY sake God and that just amazes me. Thank you for placing this need to find my significance in me, and for being the only one who can fill that. Every time, I run back to you and you are so willing to take me back. I love you God!!!!!
In your name I pray, Amen.
Today I made a lot of progress. I think this has been the more life-changing information I've read so far. I'm going to make it a point to remember that God thinks I'm important enough to die for. He thinks I'm important enough to remember the hairs on my head. What an amazing God we serve :) Continue to pray please!
